May 27, 2011

Stupid Lyrics to Stupider Songs

Please take a minute and read the lyrics, found here, to Bruno Mars's latest hit, "The Lazy Song."

This song is so stupid that it actually hurts my feelings.

A focus on some of the most absurd lyrics:

*Then Stare At The Fan/Turn The TV On/Throw My Hand In My Pants/Nobody's Gon' Tell Me I Can't

Let me stop you right there BrunDog. First of all, you just got turned on by a fan. Second of all, why would someone tell you to stop? Clearly this has been an issue in the past. Nothing's worse than a public masterbater with a fan fetish.

Tomorrow I'll Wake Up Do Some P90X/Meet A Really Nice Girl Have Some Really Nice Sex/She's Gonna Scream Out "This Is Great!" (Oh My God! This Is Great!)

1) TMI, don't want to know about your sex. 2) Regarding the P90X - Wasn't it the great Thomas Jefferson who said, "Never put off tomorrow what you can do today." Do it today Bruno!

* I Might Mess Around, and Get My College Degree/I Bet My Old Man Would Be So Prouda Me

It's pretty clear that whatever online college you're "messing around" with is not acredited. And regarding your old man, see lyric #1 above. Chances are he's not that proud of you. You sing about getting aroused by fans.

While I do have to give some kudos to Bruno for truly pulling this song out of his ass, this lyrical debauchery cannot get off of the radio fast enough.

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