May 20, 2011

Mental Pictures Are Ok

Seriously Humanrace…What the HELL is the deal with pregnant photo shoots?!

They are NOT cute!!!

No one needs to see your husband cuping your boobs from behind while you are both cloaked in denim. No one needs to know that you have a giant line of hair down your belly. That can be sacredly kept between you and your baby daddy.

Sure I understand that you may what a reminder of your baby. But here’s an idea, just look at your living baby!

And maybe you even want to remember how it feels to be pregnant.

I’ve covered you covered there too. Just get so drunk some nights that you throw up the next morning. Or eat a giant Mexican meal so you feel like you’re in your 3rd trimester.

Hell, I feel pregnant all the time and I’ve never even had a baby! It's easy!

Do what you have to do. Just don’t put that $hit on Facebook. If you tell me you’re pregnant, I’ll believe you. I don’t need to see you and your Mister frolicking in a field wearing a white button up with only the top button buttoned.

Get your giant ass to Pea in the Pod and get that stomach covered!


  1. you are so freaking hilarious. I wish you lived in dc so I could stalk you and make you meet me for cocktails. off the charts, you are.

  2. C. Dugan - best comment I've ever received. It would be my honor to be stalked by you. If only Nancy pants wasn't leaving us both :'(

  3. hahah "Hell, I feel pregnant all the time and I’ve never even had a baby! It's easy!: - ditto!!!!!!!! :)