May 06, 2010

Half diva, half animal


Something really, really gross happened to me recently. Warning, eat your breakfast before reading this.

I came home from being away for just one night and decided to get me a little snacky snack.

I put some food in the microwave and then I hear a boom, grinding sound that I certainly didn't remember from the day before. Then I smell the kind of smoke that you get when something is burning from within, like a motor.

After re-opening the microwave I see, to my horror, about 60 ants INSIDE the microwave. Gross.

Upon further inspection, I move the microwave forward and see about 600 more ants coming out of the back of the microwave.

O.M.G. A mother freaking colony of ants had set up shop in my microwave, thus causing it to explode when I turned it on.

Now I've had ant problems before, but this was too much. It gets worse.

After unscrewing and taking off the back of the microwave, I find probably 6,000 ants inside, all clamoring after their eggs and trying to escape to freedom.

Long story short, I no longer feel clean in my own home.

Ants, bugs, inc. are annoying, yes. Gross, yes. But to me, they are mostly just rude. That is like me coming into someone's mansion, inviting 600 of my closest friends, and then prancing around on the kitchen countertops and inside the appliances. RUDE RUDE RUDE!

Quit coming over, ants! You're no longer welcome in my home!

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