January 26, 2012

How to Survive a Hand Towel When Your Butt is Bath Towel Size

I showered at the gym today, in an attempt to complete most of my day-hates. And I took in 2 towels with me. One for my hair, and one for my body. But things didn't go as planned...

I accidentally grabbed two HAND towels instead of two BATH towels. And naturally I did not realize the error of my ways until after I was showered, naked, and surrounded by 3 other showerers in the stalls next to me.

A mad dash to the bath towel section was not an option. And even an attempt, I'm sure, would've ended in an XL White Lightening slipping on the shower floor and ending up in a un-toned ball of nudity on the floor (I would be the White Lightening in this situation).

So I did what any Girl Scout Gym Rat wet, naked fatty would do. I made a mini skirt out of one towel and a tube top out of the other. And I creeped to the dressing room as fast as my ample legs could carry me. Buuuut, before I got to the dressing room, I had an accident. No I did not pee in my handtowel mini-skirt. Instead I accidentally launched my watch INTO SOMEONE'S SHOWER. That they were in. Showering. Also naked.

I obviously had to ask the showering stranger if she could pass me my watch back. She obliges, picks up the watch, and opens the curtain to hand it to me, only to catch a glimpse of me - wearing an outfit made entirely of petite towels. To say she looked impressed would be an understatement, and a total lie. Hello embarrassment, it's been a while but I'm glad to know we can pick up right where we left.

The outcome of this whole incident could really go either way. Either I get really motivated to lose weight and get skinny so that the next time I end up with only hand towels I look good. Or I am just going to live in fear of ever seeing the girl who handed me my watch that I never exercise again. We shall see.

Either way, just to be safe, next time I'm bringing a towel from home!

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