December 06, 2012

What the What, Sad Clown Edition

Are you on the prowl for a new job?  Perhaps you need a little extra spending money for Christmas but don't have the time to be a full-fledged part-time "seasonal"?  Well if you live in the Durham area of North Carolina, I have the opportunity for you!
Job description here on Craigslist: Sad Clown.
And here, with my commentary in italics:
"While this particular position may not specifically be for writers only, I felt that I should offer this opportunity to a particular field that may be most in need of some cash.
A very special day is upon me and I would like to celebrate by bar-hopping, and on this particular night, I'd like to have at my right hand a weeping clown.
For $150 and drinks, I would like you to accompany me to several bars in the Durham, NC area. You will have to be in a clown costume and you will be required to cry. The only time I would ask you to stop crying is to take another shot. (that seems fair)
They do not have to be real tears.   (but they probably will be)
Clown must be of drinking age, preferably mid-thirties.
Must have a high tolerance for alcohol. (and humiliation I assume)
If you can attend the "after-party" at my house, there's an extra fifty bucks and a futon in it for you, but you must like cats."
  (I don't even want to know what is going to happen at that after-party.  Cats + Sad Clowns + Alcohol = A fetish that I need not know exists)
The poster doesn't go on to say what the "very special day" is, but I am going to guess by this ad that it is not losing his virginity.  Probably more along the lines of beating World of Warcraft.  By himself.

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