Last night I was alone. All, all alone. This is noteworthy because I haven't had a night when I had the house and the DVR to myself, plus no social obligations to attend in more than a year. It was just me, the couch, and the Bachelorette.
Hell, last night I was the freaking Bachelorette. Sure I don't weigh 80 pounds like Emily. Sure I don't have the best looking veneers that ABC viewers have ever seen. And sure I don't have an illegitimate child named Ricky. But I treated myself like a hell of a lady last night, and it was glorious.
After having such a big weekend at my sister's wedding, I was going to go to bed super early, not drink, and eat nothing but a salad. But instead, after learning that my husband was going to stay elsewhere for the night, I wined, dined, and Channel nined myself (that is the channel that the Bachelorette is on here...not a new sexual thing that you do alone.) I couldn't resist indulging!
I love being by myself so much that I think I'd actually like being stranded on an island by myself. As long as I had endless wine and cable. I wouldn't even need that much food. I'm so food/fat creative that I could probably find a way to make a pizza out of sand. And like it.
If it wasn't humanly impossible to simultaneously survive and be alone, without being a nomad, I'd be happy to give a go.
*Final thought on last night's episode of the Bachelorette:
Who is this guy that is a "Data Destruction Specialist" and how can that be anything other than a professional paper shredder?