October 12, 2011

It's Just Way Too Damn Late Is What It Is

I just heard an amazing song on the radio. It’s amazing because it’s actually a very catchy tune. But also because the lyrics and message of the song are equal parts hilarious and absurd.

Listen to the song here for your enjoyment.

Read the lyrics to the song hear for your amazement.

Here are my thoughts on the lyrics:

- First of all, what sort of uppers are these crazy fools taking? At 5 O’clock in the morning, if I’m not sleeping, I’m already bemoaning my pre-hangover hangover, trying to get the mascara off of my eyes, and most likely having a cheese-based snack. Def not creeping to T-Pain’s bed.

- Second of all, the whole scenario that this guy and girl are creating is so disturbing it makes me laugh. I can just imagine the writer of the song thinking, Ok, I got it! We are going to get a really polite sounding British girl, who thinks common people are boring, and who suffers from a severe case of insomnia/nymphomania. The back story is that she has sex with T-Pain all the time, but only at 5AM. Ok, go!"

Then she overhears T-Pain saying he’s getting a lil' sleepy, so she beats him to his bed where she then pretends to be asleep, hoping he is “creeping”.

So, if I am to understand that correctly, she intentionally gets into a horny guy’s bed at 5AM, pretends to be asleep, with the hope that he’s in the mood to, what?....attempt to get it on with her comatose body? That is sick.

Actually I know of a situation just like that that happened in college. One of those people went to jail.

Final thoughts – Great song to listen to, not so much to over-analyze. Also, home girl needs to get a new, earlier booty call. By the time she hits 30 she’s not going to be able to stay up past midnight, let alone 5am.

Maybe the follow up song can be “It’s 5 O’clock in the PM, I just had a wine spritzer with my legit boyfriend…Then we went and got appetizers, he told the waitress, “Hey, go ahead and double size hers”….That’s really more my style :)

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