September 22, 2011

No Zzzz's for Me

It’s official. I have completely forgotten how to fall asleep at night.

It used to just take me about 2 painful hours of changing positions to nod off. Then I’d sleep like a baby.

Now I can’t fall asleep for good within even 4 hours. Even if I’ve had the better part of a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc. Wine used to be my antidote. Now it’s another culprit on the list of kryptonite that prevents my Zzzzz’s.

Do you have any suggestions of how to fall asleep at night? My sister taught me something where she says to God or the Sleep King or whoever, “Thank you for this chance to sleep. I am so grateful for this chance to rest.” I tried that and then like 3 hours later I was like, “Ok Sleep King. You just made enemies with the wrong insomniac! We's about to fight!”

It’s getting to the point where my adorable husband breaths peacefully next to me sleeping, and all I can think of is the injustice in the fact that it takes him 5 minutes to fall asleep and me more like 5 hours. Don’t I deserve that too!?

And don’t even get me started on airplanes. Unless it’s a 45 minutes flight, I always feel violently jealous of the strangers head-bobbing allover my shoulder when I can’t even doze off for a quick power nap on an intercontinental flight.

How do you fall asleep!? Apparently for me, it is not like riding a bike. I forgot how and now I’m a sleepy, sleepy girl.


  1. I have never heard that poem that you quoted me on. Was I asleep when I told you about it? You should totally do yoga and learn about breathing to cure what ails ya - it sounds weird but it helps.

  2. Yep, all about breathing for me too. I imagine lying on a black raft, in a black pond, at night with a black sky (no stars). Then inhale and exhale deeply as I count backwards from 100 - inhale, 100; exhale, 99; inhale, 98; etc. I realize this is weirdly specific but it turns my brain off and lets me drift to sleep. Also, don't look at screens (tv, phone, or computer) for an hour before getting in bed - supposedly it keeps your brain active.

    Nance - tell me more sleep poems.