January 20, 2014

No really, stop it

The unsolicited advice and comments you get when you start to look really, really pregnant are nothing short of amazing.


A few weeks ago I had a construction worker who I see everyday while walking my dog, who works on a house being built on my street ask me, "Are you about ready to drop that thing?"  I had to look all around me to make sure he was talking to me because:

1) He has never spoken to me before

2) Who says that in regards to the freaking miracle of life?

Last week I went to the dentist and while waiting for him to see me, the extremely chatty Dental Assistant started asking me questions about my baby's name, etc.  I told her I was going to name him Jack, to which she replied:

"I knew a Jack once.  From the gym.  He was really good looking...And really, really hairy!"

Ooooook?  What's the nice way to respond to that?  "Oh cool.  Well I really hope my son isn't exceptionally hairy!"


That's a tough one.  Responding to a stranger's verbal diarrhea is hard.  Especially when it involves your unborn child's potential body hair growth.  Even Emily Post can't prepare you for that shit.  

I also had a complete, and clearly insane, stranger come shake my hand in the parking lot at the grocery store to congratulate me on being pregnant.  Guess what?!  He was also born in March!  Guess what?!  I don't know you, stop shaking my hand and leave me alone crazy man!

Hey strangers - When it comes to talking to me about my obvious "situation", unlike my weight right now, less is more.

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