Baby Bangs

Have you recently given birth to a baby girl that you think is perfect, but that others think is a boy?

 

OR

 

As the author is this article asks, "Have you recently given birth to a baby girl, only to find that she is a bulbous, hairless, 8-pound elderly man?"

 

Then we've got the solution for you:

 

BABY BANGS - "The infant beauty product for the girl who has everything—except hair!"

Source

 

Now, instead of being gender questionable, your baby can be a creepy water nymph with grandma hair.  Winning!

 

Source

 

 

"There’s just one thing that Baby Bangs! can’t resolve: “We do not recommend leaving baby bangs … on any child while sleeping,” the company FAQ reads. The second your baby closes her eyes, she reverts back to bald man. Night night, ugly baby."

Rainbow Side Boob

I am the first one to admit that I'm not a style maven, but in all seriousness, WTF:

 

 

 

This is like a scene from a bad 80's porn.  But I saw it today, on the World Wide Web.  So it's real.  And it's present. 

 

There's nothing that says "Summer Day" like trapsing around a wheat field, showing copious amounts of side boob, with a rainbow colored bathing suit that is cut so high that there is no doubt your hoo-ha hanging out the front.  Summer 2K13!

Whoooo Whoooo

Before I got Rosie, I read a book about her breed.  It taught me lots of great things about her teeth, her heart, her demeanor, etc.

 

What it didn't tell me about was what to do when your King Charles Spaniel gets in a barking match with an owl at 3:45 AM.  I could have really used that chapter last night. 

 

Source

 

This was after she already woke us up at 11:45, 1:30, and 2:00 barking for no reason.  It went on about every 30 minutes for the entirety of the night.  Until the morning light came through the windows. 

 

(I'm sure the owl had no idea it was participating in ruining my REM cycle, poor guy).

 

That's when she started barking again for no apparent reason that I could tell.  The owl had said it's goodbyes.  The weather was calm.  There was nary a noise to be heard.

 

It wasn't until I got up and she was STILL barking that I realized what her problem was this time.  She had found her reflection.  And, unlike most people who have met Rosie's adorable little face, she was NOT a fan.

 

Needless to say, I got a super crappy night's sleep and I'm now hung over on Rosie and lack of sleep.  She's really lucky her face is so damn cute, but sometimes I think if it wasn't, I might have to kill her.

 

 

That seems reasonable...

Royal Baby and Subsequent Ridiculousness

Source

 

I am so excited for Kate and Wills.  But I have to be honest with you.  I also feel a little sorry for the poor lassie!

 

Source

 

Can you imagine being scrutinized and analyzed that much after birthing a human from your nether regions? 

 

Here are just a few of the most ridiculous and non-important headlines I've seen relating to yesterday's birth of the royal heir:

 

At 8lb 6oz, the Royal baby is the heaviest future king in 100 years

 

So did the full moon send Kate into labour? Old Wives' Tale proven in the timing of Royal baby delivery

 

Why the Middletons (and NOT the Windsors) will make Wills a great father

 

'It's a black boy': Excruciating moment tourist leaves Sky presenter Kay Burley in stunned silence with tasteless joke about the royal baby

 

Meet Team Kate: From the vicar's daughter to the karaoke addict, the aides who were there for the birth

I think you get the idea.

 

 The only thing about this situation that does not evoke my pity is the fact that she has a Royal Hairdresser coming to her room to fix her up before her big debut with the baby.  All women should get that luxury after enduring the birthing process.  Perhaps we should vote on a bill for that in the next election, ladies??

 

Source

Joseph Joseph Kitchen Tools

These kitchen tools are da bomb.

 

 

My mom got them for me from Costco, and they have since rendered all other cooking utensils obsolete.  Besides tongs.  I got to have my tongs.

 

They are cute, clean cut, colorful, perfect for any cooking activity you can do, and also have a nice little weighted handle bar to rest on pots.

 

If you are a member of Costco, buy these.  It won't be a regretful impulse decision like that 60 pound bag of Easy Mac you bought in the past.  These, you will love everyday.

 

Thanks mom!  Thanks Costco!