Total Recall - Baby Edition

I was watching the news Today Show this morning when I saw a brief segment about the Pfizer recall of approximately 1 million birth control packets. Article: here. And by brief I do mean brief, maybe the segment lasted 10 seconds?

That's not a whole lot of time to break it down to a woman that she might be accidentally pregnant. Good morning!

I was actually on the Arc Trainer at the gym when I saw this on TV. It's a good thing I don't take that birth control, because I would have fallen right off of that machine if I'd just heard word, via the 3rd tier morning-news host, that I might be about to have a baby, by accident. And not even my accident! The accident of multi-billion dollar company that's sole purpose is to develop and distribute safe prescription pills.

Not cool, Pfizer. Not cool. I'm pretty sure that's not how family planning is supposed to go. Mazel mazel to the new moms out there!

Dumbass, Party of One

I recently read this article about a man who was released last year from prison, after almost 19 years, for a murder he did not commit.

The man's name is Frank Sterling. And last week, he was accused of sexually abusing an 11 year old boy.

Yes, that is disturbing and sad. Yes, I'm sure Mr. Sterling has some deep emotional issues he is dealing with after almost 2 decades of being unjustly incarcerated. But more than anything, that is f*^#ing stupid.

Why in the world would you risk going back to prison after you just got a new lease on life after being locked up for 20 years? Maybe ol' Frank just really loves prison food or the warm hug of a jail cell.

Either way, Franky's an idiot. It's one thing to relapse after a stint in rehab for using one particular drug of choice. But it's quite another to spend 19 years in the clink as an innocent man, and then put yourself at risk for going back for an altogether unrelated crime.

I don't know what Frank Sterling did in prison for 19 years, but it obviously was not cultivating his good sense.

World's Worst Mother

Well, this isn't nice. Article to this article, a mother in Australia tried to sell her 2 kids on eBay to the highest bidder.

I'm going to say this hurts worse than selling your children into child slavery, but at least that's kind of an established system. This is just one mother going rogue on the Internet. Very rookie move.

After some investigation, the mother said that it was all a joke. But I'll be damned if those kids aren't in for a lifetime of Mommy issues now that the whole world knows that A) their mother doesn't want them and B) they didn't get any high bids.

That is a way uncool joke as a mom and a human. Maybe she forgot to read that chapter in Parenting 101 that says, "Don't put the carseat facing forward, and Don't sell your kids on the Internet."

Twins!

While I don't typically watch the news all that much, I watched the hell out of it when I was in Greece. It was the only English option after all.


One of the CNN correspondents who is on the international news, Barbara Starr, had a striking resemblance to none other than Mrs. Sally Jesse Raphael. Minus the red framed spectacles.


Can you see the resemblance? Me thinks it's uncanny!

Osama Be Dead, Geraldo Be Cray Cray

In case you are living under a rock or you were lucky enough to fall asleep before 10pm last night and still be asleep (in which case I want to punch you), you know that yesterday Osama Bin Laden was killed by US armed forces and subsequently buried at sea.

In case you aren’t sure, check out this link which shows almost 40 newspaper covers with the same story.

While I am delighted that this evil face of terrorism is gone forever, I do not typically get “happy” when I hear about people dying.

The same, however, cannot be said for Geraldo Rivera. Homeboy is straight up JAZZED about OBL’s death. Check out his report here. The real crazy starts around the 2:50 mark.

He goes on to call Osama’s death a “brilliant way to start your week.” I’m sorry, Mr. Sensationalist, but that is not even responsible journalism.

I liked how no one he tries to talk to on the phone is ever there. It just makes him look like an even crazier person who is talking to himself in a fake newsroom.

Fox News lovers, let’s not forget that Geraldo was also the same person who brought us important stories on his talk show “Geraldo” like the plight of Sylvanus "Hambone" Smith, #16 on this list of the World’s Heaviest People. I remember Hambone well.

RIP Hambone. Not so much Osama. And Geraldo, you be crazy.

On the Loose

Well this is not good news.

It looks like 476 prisoners escaped from an Afghan prison last night. 100 of which were Taliban commanders. If I were a local near that prison, I would be shaking in my burka!

In case your case of the Mondays wasn't already bad enough...

Something tells me this escape wasn't quite as touching as Andy's escape in The Shawshank Redemption, with the soothing voice of Morgan Freeman letting you know that justice was being served.

This seems more like a case of Taliban insurgents disappearing under the cloack of darkness to seek revenge and cause harm to innocent people.

Where'd Red when you need him!?