2 Weird

Living Social strikes again.  But this time it isn't their fault that the deal sounds ridiculous.  It's the fault of whoever named their fitness studio "2 Sexy Family".

 

 

 

My friend sent this to me with the caption: "It sounds like a Chinese dish."  So true. Yet so wrong.

 

It also sounds like a direct translation from a non-native gone terribly wrong.  Like the time I saw a store in Buenos Aires called "Big Sexy Pants".

 

It also:

 

1) Makes me associate families (i.e., children) with sexiness and makes me feel suber disturbed.

 

2) Reminds me of this song and totally redeems itself!

 

 

Photo Sesh

Finally!  An affordable way to capture my fat ass for all eternity.

 

Continuing to blow my mind week after week, Living Social is now offering a 90-Minute Boudoir Photo Session with a local photographer. 

 

I'm sorry, but 90 minutes?  How big is your damn boudoir?  I'd need 5 minutes flat to mount the bed, strike my trademark tiger pose, then tell that photog to get to gettin'. 

This body needs not be photographed.

 

That would be so awesome to give this to someone as a Christmas present, watch them react in horror, then actually go through with the shoot just because they feel too guilty to tell you they hate it.  It's never to early to start shopping for the holidays!

 

No Shots for You

Sometimes Living Social deals are just too ridiculous for words. 

I got an email this week offering a Bartending Course for $25.  Not an actual course where you learn to toss bottles and throw martini shakers behind your back.  Just an online course for BartendingCollegeOnline. 

I went to that college once.  It's called Google.  And it can teach you how to make any drink, ever.  For free!  Hell, just last week I learned how to make a Vodka Soda with a splash.  My parents were so proud of me!

So save that $25 to actually buy drinks, instead of just learning how to make them in "college". 

Back to the drawing board Living Social.

And Gosh Darn It, People Like You

I love a deal as much as the next much as the next person.  And probably even way more than that person.  I use coupons whenever I can, buy massages on the regular from LivingSocial.com, and get my hair cut at Great Clips.  But when it comes to my ultimate life dreams and goals, that's not where I want to pinch pennies.  So you can imagine my amazement when I opened today's LivingSocial.com deal for the Wilmington, NC area:  Initial Beliefs and Behavorial Analysis, and Life Coaching Sessions.

How do you even become "certified" in life and success coaching?  What do you think the test is to prove your ability?  Successfully talking a suicial person off of a ledge??  Otherwise I call BS.

Look I'm me, I'm certified too: "Stop feeling sorry for yourself.  Get a job.  Be nice to people.  Don't suck.  And pay attention to the task at hand."  There - Now you have all the keys to success!

I would never pay $75 (discounted from $425!!!  WTF) to have a perfect stranger call me and tell me I'm special.  I have my parents for that.