When It Rains It Pours

You know the saying, "When it rains it pours"? Well sometimes that's so true and horrible that it just has to be hilarious.

In the last 4 or 5 days following the death of my grandmother, which is already sad enough, the following things have happened to several different members of my family:

1) A full upper-lip bruise that very closely resembles a mustache due to a fallen-box-on-face incident - Who doesn't want that when they are greeting 200 people who have come to pay their respects to your deceased mother?

2) Appendicitis and an emergency appendectomy.

3) A stress-related fever blister - also upper lip, also great for greeting over 200 people.

4) Flat tire

5) A still unexplained scare with the fire department

6) Wet pants - this one was a 2 year old so that's more natural, but still, no one likes to pee in their pants!

As for me, I'm just fine. I drove 16 hours in 3 days with a cold so runny I don't think my nose will ever be the same, but I really can't complain compared to the other random catastrophes that befell the rest of my family.

Long story short: I'm back. I do NOT like funerals. And I want the 2 layers of skin around my nose back.

Divas in Heaven

Sad news. We lost a fellow diva last night. And she was one of the true greats!

My grandmother died last night :( But now she will rest in peace forever! :)

Can you believe that is the first grandparent I've lost? I'm 27 and up until yesterday I have known and loved all 4 of my grandparents. I think that's pretty awesome.

I actually have a grandfather who is 96! He told my dad once, "We don't amount to much...But we live forever!" Haha, so far so good Mamacita.

Anywho, I'm going to be road trippin it to Florida with my dad here in a minute so I'll be out of comish for a few days.

See you back in a couple of days and please send good thoughts my way!

Eternal Diva

Elizabeth Taylor was 15 minutes late to her own funeral, at her own request.

http://www.people.com/people/package/article/0,,20261725_20476376,00.html

This is truly a diva move. And 50/50 in the way I like. 50% like because it's the most ridiculous, diva move ever. And 50% dislike because I think being late should be a federal offense.

Other mindblowing facts about the funeral:

1) It was an hour long

2) It was multi-denominational...I can understand that for a wedding b/c 2 people might have different religious beliefs...but for one person to be multiple religions even in death... just make up your mind!

3) Carrie Fisher, aka Princess Lea, is her stepdaughter

4) Colin Farrell gave a reading. What. the. hell.