Epic Celeb Sighting

On Sunday I saw a Teen Mom in the Atlanta Airport.  And I don't mean just any teen mom.  I mean a real Teen Mom.

 

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Maci Bookout.  With no "e" y'all, because it's extra classy.

 

If I could describe the excitement in one word it would be..."non".

 

No one was staring at her, no one was asking for her autograph, no one even appeared to recognize her except for me, the 29 year old white girl who clearly needs to upgrade her tastes in Television.

 

It turns out if you want that perfectly manageable level of fame in which you get paid for doing nothing but aren't harassed or recognized too much in public, you just need to get knocked up by a raging douche when you are 16 and get on a reality show!

 

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And yes, she was TINY in real life.  Like maybe 90 lbs.  Her hair was also a multitude of colors, but mostly that purple/red combination she's been rocking recently that occurs exactly zero times in nature.

Teen Mom 2 x 2

Stop it. Just stop it.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2082437/Teen-Mom-star-Leah-Messler-pregnant-engaged-again.html

The buzz on the Teen Mom 2 front today is that Leah Messler is both pregnant and engaged, both for the second time.

The only thing you really want in "two's" when you're 19 should be college acceptance letters or invitations to prom. Not marriages and illegitimate pregnancies.

If you don't know who Leah Messler is, you are likely both smarter and more sophisticated than me. If you don't know what the show Teen Mom is, then you are very, very lucky, and possibly without a television set.

It's an inexplicably addicting show about girls who have unprotected sex, get pregnant by their uneducated and/or emotionally abusive baby daddies, then proceed to be continually shocked as their lives fall apart and they drop out of school.

So it's just sooo heart warming that Miss Leah decided to do it for the second time, at the ripe young age of 19. Hell of an example, girlfriend!

Girl, ya crazy. Whatever happened to just flirting on the phone and staying home at that age? Pop some popcorn, rent a RomCom, and for the love of God, if you must leave your house, buy some damn condoms!

Bittersweet Fertility

Another joyous ending to an uplifting season of Teen Mom 2. Just a few thoughts on this finale.

The only question more perplexing than where the hell Janelle’s mom got her accent from is how Janelle has the audacity to yell at her mom for yelling at her…the day after she got arrested for 1) Breaking and Entering, 2) Possession of Marijuana, 3) Possession of Paraphernalia.

And the only thing more awesome than Corey and Leah getting married in Camouflage is that they actually got married at a place called Coon Skin Park. That’s just straight up romantic, yall!

Also, it was such a sweet treat for lil Aubrey when her baby’s mama’s mama used her Birthday wish to wish for Chelsea to stay away from her baby daddy. I’m sure that’s exactly what that one year old wanted!

This show really warms the heart.

Bedazzled bestupid

If every baby momma on Teen Mom 2 is after her baby daddy for money for diapers and formula, and always jonzing for a place on her own, then why do they always have brand new, albeit heinous, fake nails!?

Shouldn't that money go to your baby's well-being rather than plastic bedazzled nails?

Hide your kids, hide your wife baby momma

Tuned in to the newest group of Teen Moms yet? I sure did.

I'm afraid Janelle is going to make it hard to watch this season, as she is a wretched mom-hating monster.

Highlights so far:

Favorite quote from the episode regarding Jace's baby daddy Andrew -> "He's supposedly modeling in China."

Favorite post from the Teen Mom 2 comment section -> "Jenelle is the new Amber."

I am ashamed to understand that sentence, but delighted that the new season is upon us! When you know, you know!

Teen Mom and other Offences

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I seriously cannot believe that 3 out of the 4 moms from MTV's Teen Mom have recently graced the cover of some of my most beloved magazines.

Surely, SURELY, there is something more interesting going on in the entertainment world than these too-young-to-be-moms.

I admit to watching the show out of sheer boredom every week, but that does NOT mean that I respect myself for doing so.

If I were a broke, insecure teenager and I watched this show, I wouldn't necessarily walk away from it knowing that it is hard and lonely to have a child when none of your peers do and you have no idea how to take care of another life.

I would walk away from it thinking, "Damn, if I want to get famous and rich from magazine covers, I should go try to get pregnant from the local village idiot."

Great message publications of America.

But what has really got me heated is this week's cover of People magazine.

1) People, I know you're technically a tabloid, but I really thought you were better than this.

2) If you really want to be picky, Tyler and Catelynn shouldn't even be on the show because they aren't actually teen parents. The people they gave their baby to are parents, not them.

3) Finally, how long can one person have braces?! Catelynn...my advice to you, take some of that People money and find a new orthodontist because 3 years is too long to have that damn metal on your teeth.